Top 10 Things Gay Men Can Love About Football
By Lawrence Pfeil, Jr.
Does the kick-off of football season have you looking at that black mess on players cheekbones and wonder, “why do they buy eyeliner and mascara at the dollar store?”
Do you imagine “training camp” is a place for wanna-be drag queens?
Do you think the gridiron is what your dry cleaner uses to press your shirts?
Do you believe the difference between a fullback, halfback, and quarterback is a “Buy-One-Get-One half off” sale?
Well then theOUTfront is here to highlight some the gayer points of America’s secular religion.
Jockstraps
Muscles
’nuff said?
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Locker Rooms
Best explained with a Broadway musical production number
Dat Ass!
and Dat one
And All Dat Azz!
Tailgating
What man doesn’t enjoy wrapping his lips around a thick sausage or having a tossed salad before the “big game?”
Scoring
It doesn’t matter if you’re playing touch or tackle, when you score, you win!
Man Crushing
Whether you like a tight end, a wide receiver, or kicker who can drill it through the “uprights,” the roster of beefy gridders is endless. Here’s a few we crush on hard.
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Pick a brother, any brother
JJ, Derek, or TJ #WattAChoice
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Cheering
For Carl Nassib the only openly gay player in the NFL. Since he publicly came out, he has been tackling homophobia and hate with his philanthropy and new social media app rayzeapp
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Football Is Like Sex
When played well, both are full contact sports that leave you sweaty, sore, and out of breath.
Super Bowl (halftime) Parties
The Super Bowl Sunday has become America’s high holy day for gluttony parties across the country. Starting hours before kickoff, competition for the best wings, pizza, chili, dip, and any other artery hardening delicious crowd pleaser begins. Along with the food is the estimated 325.5 million gallons of beer that wash it all down. But for those of us sitting in the “Lavender Seats” are really only playing along to see the halftime spectacular. While we don’t know who that will be this year or which teams will be playing each other yet, Super Bowl LVII will be played in Glendale, Arizona on February 12, 2023.
This post brought to you by the NFL*
Got Balls?
*National Fabulous League
